Thursday, February 14, 2008

Valentine's Day

Today, I tried something different. I posted...unbeknownst to my wife...on her blog:

http://www.mom2dbmk.com

Sorry, dear...but I couldn't help myself :)

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

tic tac® candies and me

So, me and tic tac® candies (correction: mints) have an interesting relationship.

Namely, I devour them en masse...I mean, for God's sake, I just tipped the container back and have six of them in my mouth now...wait, no...make that five of them ;)

Anyway, over my life I've run into what I thought were all of the various flavors: peppermint (white), spearmint (green), cinnamon (red), orange (orange). I like most of them, however I hold a special place in my heart for the orange ones...I can put away an entire container (37 mints) at one time with the orange ones. I just open my maw, pop open the container and start shaking...it's truly sick. The peppermint ones are ok, as are the cinnamon ones. The spearmint ones can be a little painful, what with my method of ingestion (see above).

Recently the snack fund proprietor's at my office provided two types I hadn't seen before: wintergreen (light green) and citrus twist (odd yellow and green).

The wintergreen ones are tolerable...a little like their other green brother. A little intense in large groups...say 5 or more, but find in smaller groups.

However, the citrus twist ones are horrific. I figured, "Hey, I like Sprite® and other lemon-lime stuff...these should be ok." Uh...no...not even close. I don't know who came up with the flavor for these, but they taste kind of like the lemon fresh Clorox® wipes smell...not good...not good at all.

Anyway...if you haven't tried the citrus twist ones yet...save yourself the trouble and stick to the orange ones...on second thought, git yer hands off my orange ones. And if you have tried them and like them...I'm sorry and you have nothing to fear from me...I'll stick with the orange ones.

Again...did I mention sickness...six of them this time :)

Monday, February 11, 2008

Security & Kids

So, we visited a new church yesterday...and of course, I get to drop off the young ones while the other parental unit finds an acceptable seating location (we won't go into how crazy that can be).

I get help locating the children's ministry location and begin the process of checking in the youngest 2...6 and 2.

So the lady asks their names and ages/school grade, to which she gets the appropriate information: K - 2 and M - 1st grade. She jots this down on 2 little pieces of paper and then stuns me for a moment with her next instruction: Please provide a picture ID. What...picture ID? I'm not buying booze or smokes here...I'm dropping off my young ones, so they can partake in age appropriate worship/Bible learning. Alas, I hand over my driver's license and receive a pager in return.

I'm figuring that's the end of it and head to drop them off at the appropriate rooms, when I'm directed to another station. Here a lady gets K's name again and my pager number, which are then written on one of those club/hospital bands...you know, the Tyvec ones that can only be removed via tin snips, chainsaw, etc. She attaches said band to K's wrist and then directs me down to their rooms. Maybe the teacher's might need some help with ID on visitors.

I proceed to drop the young ones off and head into service myself. Of course, having a sanctuary with cafe-style seating is causing the wife to stress a bit...she's more traditional than I am that way...needs her pews and the like.

Service was pretty good...with a line I'm sure made more than one person twitch in the throes of "He can't be talking to me..." as it was fairly blunt. Still, all in all, good service...didn't much care for the worship music though...but that is one I'm fairly loose on as long is it is headed the right direction, I can stand quite a bit.

So, service is over and I'm headed to reclaim my stored property...er, children. Anyway, I proceed to head toward the locations of temporary storage, when I'm politely but firmly asked to show my pager. I comply and proceed to pickup M...uneventfully. I head back to collect K, when the teacher asks to see my pager again...now wait a minute, I just showed it to that guy and by the way she tossed the toys aside and came running shrieking "Daddy", it's fairly obvious that she belongs with me. I calmly produce the pager again and after checking it against K's wristband, the teacher cuts the band off and reunites me with my second young one. I then head toward the apparent final turn-in point for the pager, with K and M in tow. I drop off the pager and am given my license and 2 pieces of paper. I'm then told to go to the last lady by the door. She checks the papers to ensure I have the appropriate number of children.

While it may seem excessive, I appreciate the nod toward securing my young ones, after all, I've seen the opposite when it comes to accountability as well. It still smacked of getting prisoners transferred...what with the whole paperwork/documentation requirements.